One of the perks of having grown kids is getting to sleep late on Christmas morning. So, we did just that, waking late in the bright sunshine of a pretty day. I fixed my world famous pancakes and then Marti, Kevin and I opened presents. It was a nice morning, but through the fun of giving and getting, there was the absence we all felt. Marti and I drove down to Arlington National Cemetery to visit with Scott and we met up with his cousin Suzy and her husband John and Scott’s Best Man, Sean. They were there before us and were busy sharing a flask of Macallan with Scott in spirit and reality. Suzy made Scott some of their Gramma Deppa’s Honey Spice cookies, a favorite of both of them and Marti and I brought him a Guinness. We visited for a few minutes and then they left to go home. Marti and I stayed. Standing there, remembering, we heard a large group of carolers up the hill a long ways singing lustily, “The Twelve Days of Christmas” to a relative or friend who is buried there. It was a very quiet day and joyfully their voices drifted down to us. When they finished the last chorus, they cheered loudly and toasted to the memory of their friend. It is wonderful that, in this place, strangers are connected and can enjoy and share the common remembrance of our lost family members. After that, Marti and I said goodbye to Scott, (and to Princess too) on our way home to dinner with our family.
Merry Christmas to all of you and here’s to a Happy New Year of Peace and prosperity.
December 26, 2007
Christmas 2007
December 22, 2007
Patriots and Families
On Tuesday, Marti, her brother Roy and I traveled to the State House in Annapolis at the invitation of Governor Martin O’Malley. It was a bright and frigid day in December, the first sunny day in many weeks. Our son Scott was to receive the Patriot Medal Award in honor of Maryland’s fallen heroes. In addition to Scott, there were 25 others who were to receive the award. Soldiers, Airmen, Sailors, Marines, Firefighters. Police and Paramedics were honored that day. All gave their lives so we can live the way we do.
I noticed that among the names in the program was Sgt. Princess Samuels, 22, of Mitchellville, Maryland. She was assigned to Headquarters and Headquarters Troop, 1st Brigade Combat Team, 1st Cavalry Division, Fort Hood, Texas. She was killed in hostile action in Taji four days after Scott died. I remember reading in the Metro section about her service at Arlington. It was just a few days after Scott’s service in August and the images and emotions of that day are still fresh in my mind and heart. I know how the family felt. So many people don’t and that’s OK, but I know what her parents were feeling.
When Princess’s name was called we watched to see which of her family would be there. A lone, pretty woman rose and accepted the medal and posed for the photo. After the awards ceremony the Governor invited everyone to enjoy some refreshments and meet the families of the other honorees. I stood and looked around for the woman so I could speak to her and saw Marti already heading in her direction. Separately we were both thinking the same thing, we do that a lot. The emotions of that day at Arlington rushed back to all of us as Marti took her hand, introduced herself and explained that Scott and Princess are beside each other at Arlington. The lady told us that she was Princess’ Aunt, and that she had promised herself that she wouldn’t cry, but none of us quite made it. We promised to “say hello” to Princess whenever we go to sit and visit with Scott. They are now neighbors forever in the garden we never wanted them in.
Blogging, Civility and Merry Christmas
I am new to blogging. I am also late to blogging. So, to catch up, I have been wandering, exploring the “blogoshpere” looking and reading and being pleasantly amazed. The great thing about this is that here it is a place ( is it really a place?) where people who want to share or exchange ideas, recipes or just discover new shades of humanity can do just that. Blogging has given more of us a wonderfully democratic platform of opportunity, a voice that is not dependent upon the permissions of others to raise and raise it some do. Everything from pith to pornography, but there is smoke coming out of the dragon’s cave.
And so, I am also despairingly amazed. I discovered a place where hate and vituperation are proliferating. Right Wing nuts, Left Wing nuts, Middle Wing nuts. In this world it is hard to express an opinion without drawing the fire of someone who disagrees with it. That’s OK, but very often that disagreement is expressed bluntly by a hateful attack upon the writer. The best rules for discussion, Civility and Respect, no longer apply. Rants of screaming derision, slander, pomposity and arrogance, hateful attitudes that are all way too common in today’s world are also common here. Apparently the weapon of choice for these intellects is the blunt instrument of hot, turgid rhetoric.
When did we lose the ability to have a civil conversation of disagreement? Today there is little requirement for politeness, no respect for the opinions of others who are strangers. Civility, which used to be the presumption is on a losing streak. If we are to regain our civility, we must as a species and as a society put this compulsion, (it is a compulsion, hate is not the result of reason) aside and learn to tolerate our differences. Toleration is not the same as liking something or agreeing with everybody. It is simply toleration. It is living with an idea that you might not choose to think or an action that you might not take yourself. Toleration does not mean anarchy or lawlessness but rather it is the hallmark of a civil society. Civil society demands politeness, kindness and respect in all things. Face to face it is so much easier to be friendly, but behind the anonymity of the internet it is so much easier to not be. When looking someone in the eye it is much harder to differentiate, to hate, to accuse, to belittle, to defame him. It is so easy when one can hide in the ether, that is why there is so much of it here.
I like people. I like strangers. My wife, Marti, will tell you I stop and talk to anyone on the street if given half a chance. To me, everyone is fair game for a pleasant or humorous remark. Taking the high road always means a climb uphill, but the view is superior. So while you are out shopping this Christmas season listening to the carols or enjoying the company of officemates, or friends and family, even a stranger for that matter look into their eyes and pay attention to what you see. Smile at them, touch them, enjoy them. Share your humanity and say thank you or even, “I love you.”
It may not yet be too late and it is contagious. That’s a good thing.
Merry Christmas!
December 12, 2007
Where is Ernie Pyle?
The apathy of a great majority of my fellow citizens towards this war in Iraq is killing me. Partially, but not entirely because my son gave his life there, but because I remember the phrase, “If you are not outraged, you are not paying attention”. Well most people are not actively outraged so I have to wonder why they aren’t paying attention. I sure don’t question their patriotism or love of country, like so many might, but perhaps more Americans would be more interested in the day-to-day success and failures of our troops in Iraq if its status was really reported to us by the mainstream media. Maybe Americans would take a more active interest in either continuing the war or ending it somehow if it was on their radar every day as it was in the 60′s during the Vietnam War. The Pentagon learned their lesson from that war and now their efforts to keep a strangle-hold on the “message” over the last four years have gutted the mainstream media. The MSM just rolled over and forfeited their credibility permitting a darkness where there should be questions, truth and light.
So… Where is Ernie Pyle when we need him? Right now, some younger readers are asking why we need the help of some relative of Gomer Pyle’s. Still younger readers are wondering who either one is.
Ernie Pyle was a Pulitzer Prize winning War Correspondent in the 40′s and no relative of Gomer. He covered WWII right up front in the mud with the troops and reported it like he saw it. He would be considered embedded today, but unlike today, he had no restrictions on what he could report. He was not alone in this but Ernie Pyle was the most widely read reporter in the world at the time. Last spring I read his 1944 book, “Brave Men”. I found it in a box of old books from my father-in-law’s house. I rescued it and it is now on my bookshelf. Ernie Pyle wrote in a clear homespun style about each and every soldier he met. He always gave the soldiers name and hometown address so the folks back home could say, “Hey, that’s my son, brother, husband, kid next door!”, and he told in detail what that guy and his unit were doing and how the unit helped the war effort. Every soldier and officer knew him on sight. He slept with the troops, he ate with them and he was with them in battle. They loved and respected him. He went in with the troops on the beaches of North Africa, Sicily, Anzio and Normandy, through France and then after Germany surrendered he went to the Pacific. Sadly, he was killed on IE Shima in 1945. His last words to the officer who was with him were, “All you all right?”
Where is Ernie Pyle when we need him? The answer to that question is that he is still there at the front. He is an amalgam of the self-supported free-lance journalists working at the front. He is embedded with the troops, humping through and choking on moon-dust. He is talking with the troops, facing the same threats they do, risking his life writing about the troops, He is writing about the encounters with the Iraqi and Afghani people they meet and help. He doesn’t work for the mainstream media. He is supported by contributions from people like you and me who want to know just what is really going on there. He may be conservative or he may be liberal or somewhere in between, but most importantly he is American and he is there with his butt on the line. His outlet just like ours is the internet. Answers, truth and light. The Battlefield Tourist, A Long War Journal and Matt Sanchez in Afghanistan are just three who do this for us. There are more and they all deserve our support. If it wasn’t for them we might completely forget the damn thing was going on.
December 10, 2007
The Yellow Ribbon Fund
For better or worse, out fighting technology has grown to the point where we can protect our soldiers from most wounds that would have killed them two or three wars ago. Body armor, improved weaponry and better field tactics reduce the number of fatal casualties but an increase in severe wounds is the trade-off. Maimed but alive. A great number of these wounded soldiers and Marines are brought to Walter Reed Army Medical Center in Washington, DC and the Bethesda Naval Medical Center in Bethesda Md. for treatment and extended therapy. These soldiers and their families are living here under stressful circumstances on military pay in one of the most expensive places to live in the country. The support from the military is adequate for some of their needs, but for these soldiers and Marines, our wounded and their loved ones, adequate is not good enough. Scott recognized this before he left for Iraq and asked us to support any organization that helps the wounded soldiers and their families. After researching the web, Marti, Christy, Kevin and I selected The Yellow Ribbon Fund, here in Bethesda as the place we thought might be doing the best job. I quote from their website,
“The Yellow Ribbon Fund was created in early 2005 to assist our injured service members and their families while they recuperate at the Walter Reed Army Medical Center and the National Naval Medical Center. Our mission began when the father of an injured Marine introduced two of our volunteers to staff at Walter Reed and Bethesda Naval and they told us what needs were not met by other donors. “
They do a fantastic job of providing just about anything the families need, from incidental toiletries and taxi rides, to hotel rooms and apartments for living. These needs are especially critical now as we approach the Holiday Season. Please visit the website and consider what donation you might make to help these wonderful people help our wounded and their families. The link is just to the right ——-> and thanks again for all your support!
December 8, 2007
Just for the record, One Hit Wonders? NOT!
Also for the record this post is thoroughly fogged by time passing too fast too far ago… bringing me to talk about one of my favorite musical groups of my youth and perhaps all time and one that unfairly bears that slur, One Hit Wonder.
Most of us old enough to remember the Cellar Door in Georgetown during the 60’s and 70’s recall the cramped dark and smoky place that might have seated 100 people who were very good friends or about to be. At 31st and M Streets, on one of the steepest streets in Georgetown, there was always a line falling downhill from the door before the evening’s show. The door inside was only wide enough to let one person by (so it seemed) and once inside you would step down a stairway into the seating area. I seem to remember seats above, but the place was always too crowded for me to ever turn around to actually see what or who was up there. I saw Richie Havens perform there one night with a “before my wife girlfriend”, (not to imply that there are any after my wife girlfriends) and we were so close that when he broke a guitar string, he stopped his performance and carried a conversation on with my friend and me and handed us the broken string when he had replaced it. The place defined intimate club. It was at the Cellar Door that some memorable moments of my youth occurred.
There are many groups cursed as One Hit Wonders. Most deservedly, some not. The name conjures inadequacy or luck or just happenstance to be in the right place at the right time with the right tune.
The fact is that when applied to the group, Starland Vocal Band , Bill Danoff, Taffy Nivert, Jon Carroll and Margot Chapman, it is slanderous and more a comment on the listening public’s easily titillated simple-mindedness than Starland’s ability and talents as artists.
I recall the tune, “Afternoon Delight” with a smile and how that cute song about nooners and quickies and fun sex between friends seemed to scandalize the radio waves when it was released. It could not miss as a hit in the 70’s. Those who are younger than me will know the song from its inclusion in movie soundtracks and retrospectives. “Afternoon Delight”, was the name of a menu item at Clyde’s in Georgetown and one day that kicked off Bill Danoff’s vivid imagination. While really fun and a great way for getting an afternoon with your honey started, it is probably the least of their efforts. Let’s go back a ways for a moment….
Starland has its roots in the Washington, DC, husband/wife duo Bill Danoff and Taffy Nivert, known as Fat City. As Fat City, they released four albums from 1969 to 1974. Oh to have those nights at the Cellar Door back again. “Workingman’s Day”, “Readjustment Blues”, “Take Me Home, Country Roads” (yes Bill and Taffy co-wrote it with John Denver), “Morning Go Away”, “I Guess He’d Rather Be In Colorado”, “Friends With You” these last four all covered wonderfully by John Denver.
Fast forward to 1975-76, I am not remembering clearly which, and “Starland Vocal Band” makes its debut sort of. I first heard them at the Cellar Door, did I say this was a phenomenal club?. They don’t make clubs like this anymore. We always went to see Fat City when they performed but this night would turn out to be special. First off, there was a piano on the stage and four mikes. Bill and Taffy were introduced as Fat City and then Margot Chapman and Jon Carroll came on stage. If I remember correctly, this was the first time they performed together in public. Right out of the box, they did “Boulder to Birmingham” a song that Bill co-wrote with Emmy Lou Harris, and they knocked us all flat. To this day theirs’ is the benchmark recording of that song. The vocal harmonies constructed by Bill, Taffy, Jon and Margot were simply marvelous. Together, the powerful and angelic voices of Taffy and Margot just mesmerized everyone that night. Jon’s playful voice and Bill’s smooth baritone perfect compliments to the ladies. Too soon the evening was over and they departed the stage to applause that almost burst down the doors off the place. As they returned to do an encore, the group stood on stage, their instruments behind them. Taffy announced that they had been working on lots of new vocal harmonies and would perform a capella for the first time, Paul Simon’s, “American Tune”, and she made no promises. They nervously started, got four or five notes in and just stopped. Taffy apologized, smiled and said, “Let’s try that again.” What magic was next. There was not a sound during the song and not a dry eye in the house by the close. Paul Simon later said after hearing their performance of his song, “It’s not my song, it’s theirs now”. To this day, when I hear that song, I stop what I am doing and listen all the way to the end. And remember.
Starland released their first album, “Starland Vocal Band”, shortly after that and “Afternoon Delight” led it to the top of the charts and two Grammy Awards for the group that year. The subsequent three albums: 1976’s Rear View Mirror, 1978’s Late Night Radio, and 4×4 in 1979, all as good in their own right, one, Rear View Mirror was even better, never equaled the commercial success of the first one and are as of now only available on vinyl at used record shops. I urge you to find them or the “Best of” compilation “Afternoon Delight: A Golden Classics Edition” released in 1995. I think this may be available on CD as well.
At the very least go to ITunes or Emusic and download the only album you can get online, “Starland Vocal Band”.
Trust me, just for the record.
